It was the year 2020.

“life is always going to have curve balls. And sometimes, quite frankly, they are going to smoke you in the head when you don’t have your helmet”

I have been away for awhile. So first off, I apologize for my absence. I have missed my writing greatly but it has been unavoidable and I hope that you will still accept me back into your busy lives. Your feedback and comments have been inspirational and so appreciated. So, that being said…

As I have contemplated all day on what to write after my brief absence, I have settled upon a touchy subject. The year 2020. And it’s bad wrap. Yup. I said it. Stick with me. Please…

I have come across countless posts and blogs and meme’s and commentaries and and and… on how horrible 2020 has been. I get it. COVID has been terrible. What is going on in this world right now is terrible! Horrible. Mind boggling. I have had amazingly intelligent and insightful conversations with so many people on this. Some days I follow the stories more than others. I will never claim that I am the most up to date or the most current on the daily news and truthfully, a lot of days I rely on friends and coworkers to keep me informed. But. I am not naive or sheltered. I get the gist. I get that stress levels are at an all time high and emotions are running our lives. I get that we are currently operating on reactive and not a proactive. I get that we are all frustrated and wanting this year to be over. Now. Skip right to 2021. Today. Go.

Can I tell you something else?

I am having one of the best years that I have had possibly in my life. Can I tell you why? Again… stick with me. Please.

I spent the early days of COVID listening to and reading about how hard it was for everyone. How isolated they were because they couldn’t go to work. How stressed they were because they had to go to work. How they didn’t know how they were going to home school their kids. How they didn’t know how they were going to pay their mortgage. I was right in there with you. Everyday. All day.

And then I realized something. And let me back track a bit. 2019 was one of the hardest years of my life. Emotionally exhausting beyond words. Every step I took and every turn I made felt like a stumble. A fall. I was picking myself off the floor every damn day it seemed. Dramatic. Of course I am. But it was hard as fuck. Not going to lie. Truth is, every year has been it’s own kind of hard since I chose to be on my own. Every year I have entered into the new calendar year telling myself “this is my year – this years things are going to get easier”. At the end of my epic 2019, I realized something. Life is hard. LIFE IS HARD.

So this winter when the calendar flipped to January, I shrugged and said “Let’s go 2020. Let’s see what you got.” It dawned on me that life is always going to have curve balls. And sometimes, quite frankly, they are going to smoke you in the head when you don’t have your helmet. Like COVID. Like racism. Like hate crimes and domestic abuse and violence and so many other unfair horrible and unjustly actions that boggle my mind and make my blood boil.

But here’s the thing. I am still happy. I am happy because that’s my choice. I have a great group of people in my life. I am happy because I allow myself to meet new people that make me excited about life. My life. The one I live. Where I love everyone and hate no one. Where I work hard at my job and make the best of it no matter how hard the day is. Where I choose to walk away from ignorance and cruelty because it does not serve me. Where I choose to stand by my friends no matter what their life choices or race. My life. And in my life, I choose.

So for me… 2020 is a great year. 2020 is the year that I accepted that sometimes, often times, life is hard. I choose to face hard. I choose to not be beaten. I have a saying that I stole from a very positive and energetic employee a few years back. ‘You do you boo’. Translation (if you need it)… do what makes you happy. I love that.

Let’s be happy amidst the chaos. Let’s not judge. Let’s not hate. Let’s embrace 2020 and let’s learn from it. And it is teaching us so very much. Just listen. Just watch. Just learn.

Life is hard. I’ll do me. You do you boo.