Alcohol.

“Feelings are just visitors, let them come and go.”

Mooji

This past week I have had two people I care about have to go to the bedside of someone close to them because they are sick or dying from alcoholism. And it hurts my heart.

Not only for my friends but for their loved ones suffering the illness. I do drink but I am not an alcoholic so I cannot speak of the suffering they are enduring. Nor can I say what caused them to become so dependent on alcohol or the power it has over them. There are many factors that can increase the risk of alcohol and substance abuse and a lot of resources that can help explain them.

What I can tell you is my own experience with drinking to stop feeling. I did this. I have been at some pretty low times in my life. And some of those times I will admit, I turned to alcohol. I just wanted to stop feeling sad. I wanted to stop feeling. Period.

But eventually I got tired of that. I realized it only made me feel more. More sad. More hurt. It wasn’t a fix for my depression, it was a cause of it. And so I stopped drinking for the purpose of trying to stop feeling.

And I started to feel more. I started to embrace the sad and the angry and the happy. Our emotions are part of us and they have a place in our lives. In our days and our moments. Trying to force them away or ignore them will never work. Ever.

I am not an expert on alcoholism and I will never claim to be. As always, I can only share with you my own thoughts and experiences and hope that someone out there will get something positive from them.

And to that person, I hope that the next time you feel to much and you want to drink to stop, think. Think about the best way to make that feeling stop. Because the best way to make it stop is to have a clear head and let that feeling run it’s course. Let it shape you and make you stronger than you already are.

Please. For yourself and for those you love. Please.