“Vulnerability is not weakness. It is our greatest measure of courage.”Brene Brown
Okay so we have talked about fear. We have talked about what we fear – rejection. Now let’s again, go a little deeper. What else do we fear?
Vulnerability. Being vulnerable. Why?
We are led to believe that vulnerability is weakness. And no one wants to be weak. So we swallow that vulnerability. We bury it deep inside ourselves and pretend vulnerability does not live here. But lets really think about it. Is it weak? Lets look at fear and rejection again. How hard is it to face those things? Fear and rejection bring us to a vulnerable place. And does facing them not require strength? Courage? Bravery?
Lets look at this as a mountain. We are standing on one side of the mountain. Vulnerability is on the other side. At the top of the mountain – in between us and vulnerability – is fear. To get to vulnerability, we need to climb that mountain and go through fear. So think about this. In order to get to vulnerability, we need to find courage, strength and bravery to climb a fricking mountain (fear) and get to the other side (vulnerability). Ergo, you need to be strong, courageous and brave in order to be vulnerable. Weak people can not climb mountains.
Let me share what makes me vulnerable.
I am not afraid to ask you what you mean if I don’t understand you. That does not make me weak. That gives me answers. And answers are what make me smarter. They are tools I need to climb the mountain.
I am not afraid to ask for your hand if I can’t get my footing. That does not make me weak. That gives me a team. And teammates are what make me stronger. They are tools I need to climb the mountain.
I am not afraid to tell you if I am upset. That does not make me weak. That makes me human. And my humanity helps me practice compassion. These are tools I need to climb the mountain.
Asking for answers, asking for help and communicating my feelings. These are all things that make me vulnerable but without these things, I am not gathering the tools I need to climb the mountain.
When we show people that we are vulnerable, they clearly see that we can climb mountains. And if they can’t, it is simply because they are still at the bottom and we have climbed too high for them to see us clearly. So should we fear vulnerability? Or should we wear it like the badge of honor that it is. Should we show others that we can climb mountains?
Yes please yes.
*This is part 3 of a 3 part post on fear, rejection and vulnerability. I hope you enjoyed reading them as much as I enjoyed writing them.